I had gone along to the local assisted living place, at the invitation of their rec. director, who would like the occasional art event for residents. Just checking out possible volunteer opportunities for my near future.
She was lovely and the people were nice, and I realized it was waaaaay too soon for me to be around wheelchairs, however nice the frail occupants. I hadn't made any commitment, still haven't, but I think I need to postpone that for a while.
Another friend had dropped in at the house and suggested before I left for my meeting, smart lady, it would be an idea to think about doing an occasional art thing for Brownies, which actually might be fun, and not carry any tough memories, easier age group for me to be around right now. So I'll wait for her to make some contacts for me. Thinking miniatures from card and paper, or stamping, or stenciling, that kind of one session project for kids.
Meanwhile, home from the assisted living meeting, I realized it was raining and cold and November, which is a month with at least four major anniversaries of deaths, birthdays of people who have died, wedding anniversary of two people long gone. And then I went to bring in the mail and there's another mailing, despite all my requests, from Hospice, this time a helpful book about how to survive the holidays.
This was all suddenly too much to handle, and I decided to put in place my recent policy of doing only what I'm up for and want to do, which entailed some cancellations. In the olden days I would have crawled out to fulfill commitments no matter how I felt, not feeling I had the right not to. But now I think I have the right not to.
Between reading MFK Fisher while being pinned down by two cats on the sofa under a throw, I knitted a pillow cover for the sofa, to replace one I wasn't much into.
This helped a lot. As did watching a bunch of old Bob Newhart shows on DVD, still funny after all these years.
Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, I did get a walk today, in the sunshine, had a nice chat with a freecycler and a neighbor and his son here visiting for the holidays, so today is marginally better. But oh well. Days like this happen, and I'm glad I can knit right back at them.
Keep on trucking Liz. I know what you mean about November. The Brownies idea sounds like it would be great fun. By all means avoid the wretched wrinklies ses I who be one of 'em. Cheers.
ReplyDeleteThere's always something that'll come and bite you on the butt eh? Yes, you most definitely have earned the right to cancel and I'm glad you are doing so.
ReplyDelete((hugs))
ReplyDelete{{{hugs}}}
ReplyDeleteDull rainy weather and the prospect of winter is enough to get anybody down. I think you are so right to be choosy about what you do and don't do right now.
ReplyDeleteAnd maybe volunteering at assisted living will never feel right, and that's o.k., too. Sometimes a person has simply had enough. Other opportunities, a different group, when the time/place/people are right, you'll instinctively know. To attempt to force yourself serves no purpose. I know - been there myself. - Jean in Cowtown
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