tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8905003879789876177.post1853854819416908240..comments2024-03-27T21:37:46.503-04:00Comments on Field and Fen: Sunshine and ShadowBoudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00641013916263271948noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8905003879789876177.post-13549466399731946062011-09-21T13:04:42.636-04:002011-09-21T13:04:42.636-04:00Just a random thought from a position of little k...Just a random thought from a position of little knowledge: maybe the get-together organized by Hospice Care was also to thank and celebrate the wonderful people who dedicate their lives to helping make our final days peaceful. If it was in the hope of providing a support group for the bereaved, then I do agree with all of the other posts. AAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8905003879789876177.post-23846448539977355862011-09-20T22:49:50.479-04:002011-09-20T22:49:50.479-04:00My mother died when I was in my 30's. She was ...My mother died when I was in my 30's. She was a verbally, physically, emotionally abusive person, her hands were used to hit, not hug. When she died I felt only relief. People would come up to me for weeks afterwards offering condolences, their faces the picture of concern and sympathy for me. I felt like a fraud accepting their wishes. The grief I felt was for what I never had, the relief a burden lifted. Mine was an extreme example of how I would not have fit into a grief support group. I suspect there are many in my shoes. I agree with the comments posted, and feel these support groups attempt to dress grief with a one size fits all, when it seldom does. - Jean in CowtownAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8905003879789876177.post-51851933987191898492011-09-20T17:52:19.671-04:002011-09-20T17:52:19.671-04:00my mother-in-law died a year ago this week, and as...my mother-in-law died a year ago this week, and as her caregivers my husband and I were involved with the hospice here. About three months after she died we got a note inviting us to attend a "Grief Counseling' event, us and a bunch of other people. Nothing like diving into a grief we never felt, to be shredded by memory and truly grief stricken strangers. Truly, some people (to be blunt) roll in such emotion, and this gives them a chance to roll a bit more. Grief used to be a private emotion. I wish it still were.mittenshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04878611591683283429noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8905003879789876177.post-1491017533632688722011-09-19T18:22:06.219-04:002011-09-19T18:22:06.219-04:00The Hermits Anonymous have climbed into their cave...The Hermits Anonymous have climbed into their cave and pulled the cave in after them. They'll never join Herm.Anon.dogonarthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07039309898163644561noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8905003879789876177.post-66075173571739250792011-09-18T22:16:14.938-04:002011-09-18T22:16:14.938-04:00Interesting concepts these groups. Can't say ...Interesting concepts these groups. Can't say that I'd be going to the hospice get together either. Probably in this so PC world we have today, someone thought it was a good idea like support groups for cancer sufferers and parents of children with major illnesses, disabilities, conditions and the like. To me, those groups are about finding ways to cope with the day to day stuff and respite help. As you say, why would you want to rip it all open again?<br /><br />Love the pic BTW.Minimisshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09291343622384393336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8905003879789876177.post-37013640043873896792011-09-18T17:19:43.828-04:002011-09-18T17:19:43.828-04:00I think that the idea that people coming together ...I think that the idea that people coming together because of a shared experience can be helpful is only helpful when it is helpful.<br /><br />And you never know if it will help because ever one is different. To meet together to be bonded by such a harrowing time does not seem remotely sensible to me.<br /><br />Whoever thought that up obviously never went through it. Which is quite sad.<br /><br />It is true however that there is no light with out shadow and that only through the bad can we come to value true goodness.<br /><br />As always you are in my thoughts.sadodosahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04778424098848698951noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8905003879789876177.post-81403721257788444842011-09-18T16:28:23.264-04:002011-09-18T16:28:23.264-04:00Well, I wouldn't go to the hospice thing, eith...Well, I wouldn't go to the hospice thing, either. <br /><br />But I do think the world is a very large place with tons of people in it and one way of gaining access to a potential field of possible friends is to join a group devoted to...something. Instead of billions in the room, figuratively speaking, you have dozens. Much easier to get a whack at the hors d'oeuvres table. <br /><br />Mensa was the most boring group of people I have ever encountered. So forget them. But Mediocre Knitters? People Who've Adopted a Dog From a Shelter? I'd go. At least you'd start off on the right foot with a group of people you have at least one thing in common with besides species.<br /><br />I'll have to put this Diski writer on the list, although not the one about The Sixties. I'm sick of hearing about The Sixties. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Beatles and How We Changed the World By Doing Lots of Drugs and Having Sex in Public. Maybe the world changed, but did it change for the better? Women still make 60 cents for every dollar a man makes. <br /><br />Ooh, ranting on someone else's site. Bad, bad, bad. No manners. <br /><br />My apologies.ari_1965https://www.blogger.com/profile/00184925473746713999noreply@blogger.com